I couldn’t help but smile reading this, Matty. Picturing you in your cozy little apartment. Soaking in a bath maybe with a good book. Wondering downstairs for a hot drink before going on a walk. That’s a beautiful life you’re leading. I too fell into that trapping for a couple of years that “I needed to make a difference and had to be remembered”. Instead my life to others might seem monotonous, perhaps slow or boring. I love it. It’s morning cups of herbal tea listening to the crackle of a vinyl. It’s cuddling up with my girls and watching a movie in the bed. It’s soaking in a tub of Epsom salts with candles lit watching the flickers of a flame. It’s in those little simple moments when we find our peace. I’ve always struggled with a restless mind. I’ve always been a deeply sensitive soul and because of this I am easily excitable and anxious. I have to work diligently at creating safe spaces for me to unwind and relax…. I’m naturally a very bubbly and sociable person… but i DESPERATELY need my alone time. I use to crave the hustle and bustle of an alive city full of art and new foods to eat but now I dream of starting over in Scotland. I’d buy a cozy little cottage in the woods. I’d bake cookies and red by firelight. Walk mossy trails with bare muddy feet. I’ve always wanted a big luxurious Victorian mansion, but as my soul has aligned and I’ve connected to less of the desires of my ego and more of the needs of my heart…. A cute little cottage in the woods is where I think I would be most at peace. Isn’t that funny? As we get older and we near death we no longer fear it? We no longer have this incessant need to “live” but instead exist. Lately I’ve even found myself gravitating towards whimsical simple books. My current read: the hobbit.
Such great stuff Matt. I totally relate to your journey. It's so hard when we try to get our significance from our accomplishments— man, I do that all the time. When you want to make big changes in the world, but then you feel an overwhelming weight. One of my new favorite books is "The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry: How to Stay Emotionally Healthy and Spiritually Alive in the Chaos of the Modern World" by John Mark Comer. I need to read it every year to remind myself that slowing down and being present is so life-giving. Your writing inspires me!
One thing you wrote here...I found super interesting. "But now I usually say the same thing—get quiet and listen. That’s it." I loooove this, because some people will only listen. They want to learn, so they shut their mouths and just listen. Which to a certain extent is true and honourable and many people would have a lot to learn from this approach....but if nobody ever said anything, just waited for someone else to speak, we wouldn't get anywhere. So maybe the way to go is to talk and express yourself just as much as the next guy, but the second those words leave your mouth, your ego should leave with them. Talk as much as you want, but the more you talk, the more you should be willing to have your mind changed.
Damn this one hit home as a 27 soon to be 28 year old - struggling to create businesses and trying to change the/my world so that I can live a life of being seen.
"I’ve always been so scared of death. But now that I’m gradually living the life I want, I’m slowly seeing that death wasn’t the fear. It was leaving without having truly lived. Without having been myself, expressed myself, taken the risks to be me. The closer I get to that true self, the farther that fear becomes." this is brilliant <3 and requires so much bravery.
Deep, touching and beautiful, Matt… x Have we all met before in another life ? It feels like you know me - everything you have written resonates so deeply with me …. Thank you…. X ❤️🤗
I couldn’t help but smile reading this, Matty. Picturing you in your cozy little apartment. Soaking in a bath maybe with a good book. Wondering downstairs for a hot drink before going on a walk. That’s a beautiful life you’re leading. I too fell into that trapping for a couple of years that “I needed to make a difference and had to be remembered”. Instead my life to others might seem monotonous, perhaps slow or boring. I love it. It’s morning cups of herbal tea listening to the crackle of a vinyl. It’s cuddling up with my girls and watching a movie in the bed. It’s soaking in a tub of Epsom salts with candles lit watching the flickers of a flame. It’s in those little simple moments when we find our peace. I’ve always struggled with a restless mind. I’ve always been a deeply sensitive soul and because of this I am easily excitable and anxious. I have to work diligently at creating safe spaces for me to unwind and relax…. I’m naturally a very bubbly and sociable person… but i DESPERATELY need my alone time. I use to crave the hustle and bustle of an alive city full of art and new foods to eat but now I dream of starting over in Scotland. I’d buy a cozy little cottage in the woods. I’d bake cookies and red by firelight. Walk mossy trails with bare muddy feet. I’ve always wanted a big luxurious Victorian mansion, but as my soul has aligned and I’ve connected to less of the desires of my ego and more of the needs of my heart…. A cute little cottage in the woods is where I think I would be most at peace. Isn’t that funny? As we get older and we near death we no longer fear it? We no longer have this incessant need to “live” but instead exist. Lately I’ve even found myself gravitating towards whimsical simple books. My current read: the hobbit.
bel far niente
-Sammi
Such great stuff Matt. I totally relate to your journey. It's so hard when we try to get our significance from our accomplishments— man, I do that all the time. When you want to make big changes in the world, but then you feel an overwhelming weight. One of my new favorite books is "The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry: How to Stay Emotionally Healthy and Spiritually Alive in the Chaos of the Modern World" by John Mark Comer. I need to read it every year to remind myself that slowing down and being present is so life-giving. Your writing inspires me!
such a good book! and thanks Josh, really appreciate it <3
One thing you wrote here...I found super interesting. "But now I usually say the same thing—get quiet and listen. That’s it." I loooove this, because some people will only listen. They want to learn, so they shut their mouths and just listen. Which to a certain extent is true and honourable and many people would have a lot to learn from this approach....but if nobody ever said anything, just waited for someone else to speak, we wouldn't get anywhere. So maybe the way to go is to talk and express yourself just as much as the next guy, but the second those words leave your mouth, your ego should leave with them. Talk as much as you want, but the more you talk, the more you should be willing to have your mind changed.
Great work on this one Matt, I loved it!!
Damn this one hit home as a 27 soon to be 28 year old - struggling to create businesses and trying to change the/my world so that I can live a life of being seen.
Beautifully written Matt
"I’ve always been so scared of death. But now that I’m gradually living the life I want, I’m slowly seeing that death wasn’t the fear. It was leaving without having truly lived. Without having been myself, expressed myself, taken the risks to be me. The closer I get to that true self, the farther that fear becomes." this is brilliant <3 and requires so much bravery.
besito
THIS! “I’m slowly seeing that death wasn’t the fear. It was leaving without having truly lived.”
I can fully resonate with this and with you! Really appreciate all you share with us. I feel your heart. Thank you.
Made me sir a little lot teary, i just love the rawness, it connects me to the parts of myself that i subject to numbness
Deep, touching and beautiful, Matt… x Have we all met before in another life ? It feels like you know me - everything you have written resonates so deeply with me …. Thank you…. X ❤️🤗
So beautiful. Thank you Matt ♥️
When death starts taking your loved ones one by one, you eventually stop fearing it...
I’ve always thought the cure to anxiety lies in living your truest truth.
Such a simple yet powerful message. I love reading your newsletters and knowing someone else thinks just as deeply as I do.
Matt, this is fucking brilliant. It echoes a similar shift I’m in the middle of. Thank you 🙏🏻
Beautifully written.x
I love this
big hug from peru. solid writing. solid advice.